General Update

I'm feeling really on top of my game these days, and by that I guess I just mean productive. I painted last night. I drew the night before. I went to the observatory over the weekend and revisited a book I had long since given up on. Last week I hung photos in my room that I've been meaning to hang for months. I've been exploring a lot of new music (new to me, at least). I’ve been visiting art galleries. I reorganized and cleaned out a lot of my belongings. I've been eating very healthy, drinking much less, and actively remedying long standing health issues. I’ve been exercising. And in addition to all these things that better my mind, body, and soul, I’ve been very social and have had the chance to catch up and strengthen bonds with both old and relatively new friends. I guess that would fit into the ‘soul’ category.

So in short, I suppose life is great! Taking some long overdue Stephanie time seems to be exactly what I needed. But, of course, as much as I love ‘me time,’ I enjoy the company of others as well. So, if anyone is ever feeling spontaneously adventurous and/or productive – which is my favorite way to feel – please give me a call. At the risk of sounding undeniably corny: let’s see what this world has to offer! Oh, and also, show the world what WE have to offer! (insert picture of me giving thumbs up)

Feeling Inspired

I did a little drawing tonight. I didn't have anything around my apartment - any inanimate objects - that seemed worthwhile to draw. So I pulled a picture of someone I thought would make an attractive subject. I was a little tired by the time I got to the left side with the trunk, as you may be able to tell :) so the piece remains unfinished.

I'm still trying to find a particular style. I'd like to be able to sketch in a freer, faster, and almost messier way. I tend to be a little too calculating and meticulous when I draw and I actually don't like the way that looks as much as broad strokes and unruly lines. But I haven't gone through an artsy phase in awhile, so I'm still regaining my bearings here.



(kind of weird how it shows up as a mirror image, throws the brain off for a second)

On a random aside, I went to the Griffith Park Observatory on Saturday. It was the first time I've ever been, which is kind of sad considering I am a Los Angeles native. I hadn't even intended to end up there, but I'm really glad I finally went. I had intended to find a nice little hidden grassy patch somewhere in the trees around Griffith Park where I could cozy up with my book (sounds lovely, right?). But as I drove through the area I suddenly found myself being ushered with a sea of cars to the observatory parking area. We'll call it fate.

Just get it over with already

Today I stumbled upon the following two poems that I wrote almost two years ago. But, as with most all my poetry, I don't think I ever showed them to anyone. Actually that's not true, I showed them to one person, who also writes poetry. But, I've decided: who cares? If you don't like it, well then I don't like YOU! (not really, but sort of) Also, the passing of time since I wrote them makes me less resistant to share...

I give in to flattery
When I'm otherwise content,
Regretting usually
That I've let down my barriers
For someone I barely know.

Millennia live within me,
I see,
When natural thoughts have me revert
To primal necessity;
A simple statement
'I don't want kids'
Makes me wonder,
Why waste my time?

It frustrates me
Because I've worked so hard
To make callous this palate...
But I give in to flattery.

I wonder what I'm missing
And dually, what could be
If I just knew
A little bit more
About me.

-------------------------------

He shot a peace sign behind her back
To the woman sitting in front of me,
As they entered the building tall.

It makes me wonder
if he thinks he has no reflection,
In the window;
In me, sitting small.

Just a typical Friday night with the gals

C'mon ladies, you know where to find me tonight...

Saturday Night Gallery Outings

I went to two art galleries on Saturday night with Marissa & Karina. I had my camera on me so Marissa suggested I photoblog the outing. Looking at my pictures now, I realize what a novice I am since the majority of my photo snapping commenced in a gallery gift shop. But hey, there was some interesting stuff in there. Below are some highlights, but feel free to check out the rest of my photos here.

First was a Steve Gullick exhibit opening at Found Gallery in Silverlake. The subject of his pieces are primarily musicians, both onstage and off. I didn't get a single closeup of anything, but just to give you an idea of the space and his work...



Next we headed to the Black Maria Gallery in Atwater Village. There we viewed a 3D art exhibit, but not before playing in the gift shop:

(there was just too much eye candy on the walls to pass up)

The exhibit had a few different mediums of 3D, which I didn't know existed. There was also this amazing contraption:

And I just really loved these two numbers from the gift shop. So visceral & whimsical (respectively):

That's all. I hope to frequent more galleries with Marissa, since she's on that shit like white on rice. And Karina, you just make sure you're there too. Or else.

Just some thoughts (acting deep after a few glasses of wine)

Experiences of the past are such a blur to me. Certain movies, songs, or situations remind me of a past that has long since been forgotten. And in that brief association of circumstances, sometimes a memory is triggered. But by that point in your life it feels so far removed that it's almost like deja vu. It's so strange that large chunks of time are just lost like that. As you're watching a movie one night you are reminded of a situation from 4 years prior, and it almost feels like it never happened - you never would have remembered it if it weren't for the particularly accommodating circumstances that you happen to find yourself in at that moment. How is it, that it can almost feel like it never happened? How can it seem that far away? It's part of you and it's part of who you've become, so where did it go?

I've already established that my idea of heaven would be an existence in which a person could go anywhere in the universe, at any juncture, and just silently observe. Or take part, whatever floats your boat. Now, I am establishing (well, I guess it would be implied & encompassed by my prior postulation) that heaven should also be an existence in which you have a perfectly clear memory and understanding of all the occurrences in your life. Only, any shame, guilt, or regret of the negative experiences would cease to exist. It would just be pure understanding and perfect recollection of everything. God, do I hope that's the case.

There was a time, a few years back, when I was exploring the ancient ruins of Tikal, in present day Guatemala. I was wandering along the backside of an overgrown pyramid on a cliff-side, with jaguar/howler monkeys echoing in the background - screaming - a memory that in this point in my life is vivid, but almost in a dream sense. It was eerie and supernormal to anything I have experienced. And that was the first time that I verbalized, to the two people I was with, Allie & Kelly Anne, what my idea of heaven would be. I distinctly remember divulging these fascinations of mine to them, there in the Central American jungle and ancient Mayan ruins, as we marveled at the wonder of what the empire would have looked like back in its hay day. Quite the surreal experience, I tell you what.

And now, I divulge them to you, whoever may be reading. I hope they mean something.

And This...

This is a random video that Lauren's bro showed me last night. If you love Stephen Colbert and Steve Carell, you must watch:

Something Very Much Worth Watching

On Monday night I was introduced to the outrageously hilarious sketch comedy group, "The Whitest Kids U'Know." Jon had told me awhile back to check them out and I never got around to it. But on Monday night I found myself on Lauren's couch with her and her bros, watching, I kid you not, two straight hours of sketch after sketch. Every time one finished we couldn't get to the next one quickly enough. They are GREAT. Season 2 premieres Sunday, February 10, and you can buy Season 1 uncut and uncensored here.

Here are couple of the sketches that had me holding my stomach and trying to catch my breath (No! Because of laughter). But of course, there were so many great ones that you're really just going to have to watch them all for yourself at the Whitest Kids website or the IFC website (note the episode tabs above the embedded video). Oh, and you must have some sort of appreciation for potty humor in order to enjoy some of their sketches, so there's that.

This one is awesome, despite having a silly ending (the 'personal jinx' is my favorite part):



And then there's this one, for dorks like me (definitely watch through the very end):



This one too: watch through the very end



And for the older crowds:



And the best for last:



But, oh my god, how could I even narrow it down to four? You really must devote some free time to this show.

I Love Children (but only if they're related to me)

I babysat my crew of little ones of Sunday night so that my sis and bro-in-law could go see Juno. Apparently, because of the three kids, the last movie they actually got to see in the theatre was Little Miss Sunshine. I can't even remember when that movie was in theatres. Over a year ago maybe? Anyway, I love spending time with my nieces and nephew so I gladly offered up my Sunday.

As it turns out, Oliver is a major mama's boy and carried on in hysterics most of the time I was there. I suppose I can understand - he's barely 13 months old and rarely spends time away from my sis. But as a result, he's not in any of my newest batch of photos; the crying got to be a bit much so I stuffed him in a closet for a taste of the solitary life that he'll have to come to terms with at some point. I think he got the picture. He's a little more prepared now.

Celeste, Elise, and I watched Cinderella, which I was able to drag away from my precious collection of Disney movies for a night. I think it's fair to say that Cinderella was my favorite Disney movie when I was little. That is, before The Little Mermaid, Aladdin, and The Lion King were released (yes, I was nearly 11 years old when the Lion King came out, and I ain't scared to admit it! I will never grow out of my Disney movies). Oh, but I just remembered Peter Pan...

Anyway. Check out how concerned my nieces look with the movie they are watching. Whodduh thunk that Cinderella was so intense and anxiety ridden? They even created a fort with the couch pillows, to hide behind whenever things got sticky for Cinderella...



You can see my entire photo shoot with them here (although they're all pretty similar). I was having fun playing with the settings on my camera... apparently too much fun. When Celeste finally had enough she pried her eyes away from the TV for long enough look me in the eyes and say, "Steph, I don't want you to take anymore pictures." Well okay then, that was that. Yes ma'am!

By the way... I just linked you readers to my Flickr account. I've never done that before - it seems a little too personal. But most of my pics are on private now, so I went ahead with it. Does anyone else use Flickr? I'm new to it...

Always a good time with this company

I really must share a conversation that my sister relayed to me earlier today, which took place between her and her 3 year old daughter, Elise. Elise in the one on the left in the picture/entry below.

danielle says: do you want to hear a conversation i had with elise earlier? or are you too busy?
Stephanie says: yes i want to hear, never too busy
danielle says: we were talking about family and babies and I said maybe some day mommy and daddy will have another baby...
danielle says: and elise says NO. and i said don't you want another sister or brother and she said "NO, it's not fair! I'm just getting the hang of this!"
and I said the hang of what?
and she said 3 kids
Stephanie says: hahahaha
danielle says: then she said i don't love you anymore, I only love daddy
Stephanie says: hahahahahahahahaha
danielle says: and I said why not?
and she said "you're not following my rule"
and I said what are your rules?
and she said "No more kids!"
daddy is my favorite
Stephanie says: lol
Stephanie says: oh wow. that's classic
danielle says: i especially loved the part when she says "I'm just getting the hang of this"
Stephanie says: it's funny that she's picked up a phrase like that
danielle says: anyway, she did let me know on her way in for a nap that maybe she would like another baby
Stephanie says: well that's sweet
danielle says: she is queen of these phrases. her other big one is "I can't handle this"
Stephanie says: lol
danielle says: and then i had to let her know that IF there is another baby it won't be for a long time
danielle says: well, she's a riot
Stephanie says: yes, i concur
Stephanie says: i intend to blog about this conversation later

...It was then that my sister asked me what a blog is. No joke. I sent her the link to my blog and she was quite pleased to see that much of it is devoted to her children. Throughout a good part of my explanation of what a blog is, she was convinced a blog is the same thing as MySpace, though I don't know for sure that she's ever even seen an actual MySpace page. Danielle, I hope you read this... so that it doesn't sound like I'm straight up making fun of you :-) because I loooove you!

THAT IS ALL.

My writing could never do this story justice

I had an interesting celebrity look alike comparison on New Years Eve. But you know what? It's a funny story, so instead of cutting to the chase, I'll give you the full recap:

Josh, Red, Jo & I were waiting to be seated at El Coyote for dinner to kick off a night of festivities. What appeared to be an average, mild mannered, middle-aged woman passed us as she was leaving the bar area. Her actions and words, however, proved her to be otherwise. The kooky woman stopped as she passed us and and became unusually excited by our presence, as if she already knew us. "Hiii!" she cheered, "Happy New Year to you guys!!"

We smiled awkwardly and returned the good tidings.

"What do you all have planned tonight?" she continued. "Parties? Well that sounds just fantastic! I hope none of you are driving..." She was suddenly overcome with a stern expression as she looked us square in the eyes and pointed an index finger at each of us.

At this point we could all tell she was either a little mentally off-kilter or, more likely, drunk (although she wasn't slurring her words), so Red decided to have fun with it. "No, no," he chimed in, "we're flying, actually."

"FLYING!!?? How wonderful!! I can't believe this... did you know I'm a flight attendant!! I may be old and fat, but it's no lie!" A perma-grin and wide eyes were now plastered onto my face. She continued, "Which one of you is the pilot?"

Redirecting the attention of this unexpected reaction, Red informed the woman that Josh is our aerial master.

"And what airline do you fly for?"

"Oh, uhm, it's a private plane; I don't fly commercially," Josh rebounded.

"Weeeell!!! Isn't that something! Oh boy, when I was young I used to chase after guys like you..." And then, with a wink and more piss & vinegar than any of us expected, the woman snorted and roared a feline growl, fingers curling towards Josh and everything. In fact, it was more like a bull getting ready to plow through a red cape than a feline ready to pounce.

We all lost it. We laughed uncontrollably. She continued to ask us what airport we would be flying into. "John Wayne," was our matter-of-fact response. The woman wished us a Happy New Year again and danced her way on out of the restaurant. That encounter just might have made my New Years.

Now, for the interesting celebrity comparison. At one point during the conversation the woman turned to me and said, "Oh!! Well now you look just like Jennifer Garner!" What's so interesting about this comparison you ask? Well, did you happen to read this blog entry? Do I really look like Jennifer Garner? Or could this just be another uncanny dual identity reference in my life as a 'Jennifer'. It may be a stretch, but the possibility did cross my mind.

Bah Humbug

I'm completely sick and on deadline. I can't concentrate for the life of me right now, but I have 3 hours to figure out how. Actually, my deadline is in 3 hours, so I better figure out how to concentrate in about 10 minutes.

I saw I Am Legend on Christmas Eve. What was I thinking? What am I ever thinking when I watch zombie-type movies? I couldn't sleep all night. It was horrible; I was terrified, alone in my apartment. And now I'm sick. I'm convinced that my lack of sleep that night caused my immune system to turn on me. I woke up yesterday with a mildly sore throat, took Zicam all day and felt fine.

Then it hit me like a freight train when I was sitting in a movie theatre watching Sweeney Todd last night. I had to get up and leave. It took an hour to go from feeling fine to a completely achy neck, the chills, tingly legs and a horribly scratchy throat. By the time I left the movie theatre I had a full blown flu. Luckily I wasn't missing much of the movie. Sweeney Todd was surprisingly boring, and I usually love Tim Burton; he's one of my favorites. The movie was over two hours long and after an hour and a half I felt like I still hadn't seen anything that I didn't already watch in the preview.

The worst part about being sick right now is that I have a Reverend Horton Heat concert to go to tonight. I've been looking forward to this for months but as luck would have it, I'm under the weather (what does that expression even mean?).

And now, back to my deadline. Wish me luck.

Holida-eee! .... Celebra-eeet!

Well, I hope everyone has had a wonderful holiday season so far. I know have. And there's still one more holiday to go! Christmas yesterday was just swell. We had brunch and hung out all day at my sister's house in Hermosa Beach. Her husband's family was there too and they're a lot of fun.

There's usually an altercation of some sort that takes place at my family gatherings. But this year not even the slightest bickering occurred. I got to play with my nieces and nephew for hours. After they finished opening all the presents I gave them, Elise asked me in the most innocent voice, "Steph, do you have more presents for us?" And in case she hadn't heard correctly the first time, she asked again. What a little bugger.

My sisters and I wrapped up the day at sunset - what a beautiful sunset it was - with our best Fire Marshall Bill impressions. What can I say, I guess that's just how we like to celebrate JC's birthday.

"My Name Is Lisa"

I didn't realize how ironic the video I am about to post is, until I signed into blogger this very moment and saw the entry I posted just yesterday. Ha, this situation makes the video all the more poignant... and I'm not quite sure what to think about that.

This video was featured on YouTube today. It's sad and touching (hey, I never claimed that my blog is funny). Most of all it's scary; scary to imagine yourself or your loved ones having no control over what the mind is doing. This video really struck a chord with me and it raises awareness about an incurable disease, so I thought I'd share. You never know what other people have going on in their lives - something to remember when faced with the the reaction options of patience & understanding vs. judgement.

With Bells On

Despite the busy stores, traffic laden streets, and high stress levels, I am fully embracing the controlled chaos that is partnered with the holiday season. Today my coworker declared to me that I am "losing it." She quickly followed her statement with, "but I think we all are," implying that current conditions are due to the craziness that accompanies preparations around this time of year. Yeees, eeeexcellent... I appear to be losing it only because my mind has been so plagued with holiday pitching and gift shopping lists. It has nothing to do with my inherent personality. That's the ticket!

Any other time of year, I would attempt to dispel this notion that my brain's a little out there; that while everyone else is right here on earth I'm wandering around the moon, quietly fascinated with this one strange little crater that rests right about where Cindy Crawford's beauty mark would be if it were her face projected on the moon. But no, not this time. This time I choose to take no offense to the mere observation that's been made. This time I am responding with, "Yes. Yes I am losing it." And if people want to think it's due to holiday fever, then so be it; this sort of scapegoat opportunity only comes around so often.

So if I forget your name, seem a bit detached, look a bit disheveled, or ask a question that necessitates a long explanation which, incidentally, you already recited to me yesterday, then please, take no offense and think no less of my capabilities; I'm just really losing it with all this holiday madness.

Movie Review: Juno

I just got back from seeing the movie Juno. I had been wanting to see it since I first saw the trailer, naturally, and it was fantastic, as I'm sure most people suspected it would be.

I was shopping at The Grove all by my lonesome, a state I've often found myself in lately. So, I decided to pop into the theater after having my fill of the crowds of people mindlessly herding themselves around the stores and walkways. Much to my delight, the next showing of the movie was only 15 minutes away and moreover, was not sold out. I don't know if I've ever gone to a movie by myself, but I highly recommend it; great 'me' time. Had I the time before the movie started, I would have dropped my multiple bulky bagfuls of purchases in the car, since there was no one there with me to watch them while I went to the bathroom or got popcorn and I felt I little awkward lugging them around everywhere, but c'est la vie.

Back to the movie. Fantastic. Or rather, stupendous - a word I sort of forgot about until I heard it used in the movie. Juno was positively charming, the movie itself and the main character. The movie in a way reminded me of Wes Anderson flicks, artistically and in its quirkiness. Like Anderson's, this movie took a dark situational reality and made it seem sweet, pretty, and even funny.

The dialogue was hilarious. Juno, the main character, made me wish I was in high school again, though I would have to pass on the whole being pregnant thing. She had me wishing I could go back and do it all over again, knowing that I know now about personal identity, since Juno seemed to approach her experience with a sort of mature mentality the first time around. I am now a huge Ellen Page fan. I wasn't sure how much I liked her as an actress after having seen Hard Candy, but I think her character in that was just a little too hard core for me. Plus I'm a bit sarcastic myself at times, and I felt like I identified with her personality in this movie. Oh and the father was hilarious too. One thing that disappointed me was Jason Bateman's character. I won't say why because I don't want to give anything away. But I am a huge Jason Bateman fan and I didn't like to see him portrayed in a negative light.

Other random great aspects: I loved the soundtrack. Very whimsical and innocent (and oh how I love the indie). Plus, I'm a fan of the fact that Diablo Cody is now a household name. At least in my household. Between me and me. Despite the fact that she may have been very well-known in the writing community prior to this. A scenario which, in turn, makes me a fan of hers. I find her situation inspiring and intend to learn much more about her.

In the end, I loved Juno and I highly recommend it to anyone on the fence about seeing it.

Just a little something

The Kevin & Bean morning radio show was having quite the interesting discussion about Scientology this morning during my brief drive to work. I really wanted to sit and my car and listen, but would have been late for work. Luckily the show is podcasted, so I'd check it out if you're at all interested.

Changing gears quite a bit... it's adorable picture time!!





At what point does it become inappropriate for me to be posting pictures of them in the bathtub? If you had listened to Kevin & Bean this morning, this post would be coming full circle!

oh, and, by the way...

...I L.O.V.E. Michael Madsen.

Talk about cool factor... the eyebrow expressions... YES.

That's just, like, my opinion, man.

I'm watching "Reservoir Dogs" while reading Palahniuk's Rant and drinking a nip of Jameson, neat. If that's not cool, I don't know what is.

Maybe if I was listening to some Miles Davis in the background.